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Episode Two
The window cleaner completes his job with a final bit of spit and abseils down the 30 storey building.
"I'm sorry, Carlos, what did you just say? I was distracted by the rippling muscles on that window cleaner," sighs Alexandra.
Carlos coughs, straightens his shirt, puffs out his chest proud and strong like a peacock, and says "Well, Alexandra, I just asked you to marry me. I asked you to marry the Carlos Richman."
"Marry you?" exclaims Alexandra in a manner that could either be total delight or utter horror.
"Yes, Alexandra. Marriage. The tying of matrimonial... ties. The declaration of complete commitment to each other until one of us dies or has an affair. The organising of an elaborate and over the top wedding complete with an orchestra and a flamingo-drawn carriage. The swapping of rings... you know what I'm talking about," explains Carlos.
"Marriage..." mumbles Alexandra as she walks towards a flickering candle, only to stand there for an unprescribed amount of time until we all grow bored and look for entertainment elsewhere.
Meanwhile, at Rebecca Exwife-Richman's oversized house...
Rebecca and her daughter, Sophia are sitting having a spot of tea in the sitting room. The room is predominantly pink. Pink wallpaper, pink couches, pink flowers, pink dog.
"Gosh, this tea is hot!" exclaims Rebecca. "It is making my cheeks go bright pink."
Sophia (along with the rest of us) rolls her eyes.
"Do you remember when your father and I got married?" asks the attention seeking Rebecca.
"No, mother. I wasn't born yet, so unless I have some sort of magical pre-birth seeing power I'm afraid I am at a loss when it comes to remembering your wedding," says Sophia sarcastically.
"Oh... well I just thought you might have remembered it. Anyway, it was an exquisite wedding. I looked fantastic. I wore a white dress and white shoes and had this thing on my head that was made out of the same material you find in butterfly nets," explained Rebecca helpfully. "It was the most beautiful wedding to ever be held in Harbour Town and since that day i have made sure that no other wedding out-does mine."
Rebecca strides over to the fire place, on top of which a photo of her in her wedding dress is conveniently placed.
"No one will ever have a wedding better than mine! And you can sure as hell believe that Carlos will never marry any one again, unless it is me! I shall see to it!" declares Rebecca evilly. Rebecca laughs an evil laugh, getting louder and louder and more and more evil until someone yells, "And....CUT!"
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