THE JOY OF WHELPING A LITTER (author unknown)




SOME SIMPLE RULES OF WHELPING FOR THE NOVICE:

1) You will always get more requests for female pups than male pups.
2) Your bitch will always provide you with more males than females.
3) You will always count and recount placentas.
4) You will always lose count of the placentas and never be sure if your bitch is retaining one or not.
5) Your bitch will always whelp at midnight, the night before your meeting with the president of your company.
6) The president of your company will hate dogs.



EQUIPMENT TO HAVE ON HAND FOR WHELPING:

Before actually whelping a litter it is important to make sure that you have all the correct pieces of equipment in place. This doesn't actually help the whelping but collecting the junk gives you something to do while waiting for the little miss to drop her load.

WHELPING BOX: These can be purchased but it is a lot more fun to actually build it yourself. This is a really good way to test your carpentry skills and your mate's patience. When you are finished with the whelping and you discover that the box fits together so tightly that you can't take it apart for storage (as though you actually intend to have another litter) you can always fiberglass it and turn it into a pool or hot tub. So make sure it is big. Don't be surprised if the bitch ignores the box. She's just practicing for later when the puppies are born and she has turned into a runaway mom (more about runaway moms later).

A THERMOMETER: For taking the bitch's temperature. I personally prefer to err on the side of safety so I attach a piece of string to the thermometer's end. This stops the thermometer from disappearing inside the bitch. This usually happens because taking her temperature 5 times a day can get her a little annoyed and she'll try anything to get rid of the thermometer. This will also give you some much-needed exercise as you chase her around the room, the bitch having learned to run for the hills whenever she sees the thermometer. You may think that 5 times a day is excessive but I argue that it actually helped bring the whelping about. The bitch got so tired of having something stuck up her rear end that she had the puppies just to get me to stop.

A SCALE: Try to get one that measures in ounces and pounds. This will help you become closer to your vet as the two of you while away the hours trying to convert "one pound, two ounces" to metric. Of course, this is only a benefit if you find your vet attractive.

A CLAMP: It is important not to call the clamp a clamp, for, although it looks like a clamp and it works like a clamp and it clamps off umbilical cords really well, only a rank novice would call it a clamp. It is in fact called a HAEMOSTAT. (This is Greek, or Latin, and it means "blood numbers." HAEMO for blood and STAT for statistics, but don't quote me on that.)

SCISSORS: These are used for cutting off the umbilical cord after you have used the HAEMOSTAT to clamp, sorry, haemostat it off. HINT: try cutting off the umbilical cords *below* the haemostat (that's on the placenta side, away from the puppy) rather than above it. Things will go more smoothly.

A VETERAN BREEDER: It is great to have a breeder around who has done this sort of thing before. The veteran breeder provides amusing stories about past breeding experiences, sage wisdom regarding the current whelping, and has a store of "breeder recipes" designed to help the bitch eat during whelping. Primarily though, it is the job of the veteran breeder to keep the novice breeder so busy that he/she doesn't screw up the whelping so badly that the vet has to be called. One other job of the veteran breeder is to call the spouse of the novice breeder to attend to the novice breeder when he/she faints at the first sight of blood.

LOTS & LOTS OF OLD TOWELS: These towels are used to dry the puppies off as they are born. It is a good idea to have more of them than you think you will need. This avoids the rather unpleasant scene that is likely to erupt when your spouse realizes that the towel the last puppy was dried with, which now contains red and green stains that will never come out, was a monogrammed wedding present from your spouse's now departed favorite dear great aunt. (Incidently, you cannot save the situation by suggesting that the colors of the stains now make it suitable as a Christmas decoration.)

Finally, it is necessary to have A WHOLE LOT OF PEOPLE hanging around doing nothing constructive at all. These are mainly people who have never seen a whelping before and to whom you, the novice breeder, owe a favour. The opportunity to view a bitch grunting in agony and spilling blood, green gunk and puppies out her hind end is supposed to be a rare treat and should be used to pay off any old debts.



DO's & DON'Ts:

Once the puppies are on the ground there are several do's and don'ts that you should follow:

DO: weigh them every day to make sure they are gaining weight.

DON'T: put the scale near the edge of the table because a 2-day-old puppy that can barely crawl will find a way to fall off the edge onto the floor (not of course, that this has ever happened to me).

DO: check the bitch's teats daily to make sure that she is producing milk and that none are blocked or hardened.

DON'T: put your face in the line of fire of the teat when checking for milk. You'll be surprised at the velocity at which the milk shoots out. I know I was.

DO: make sure that the bitch is licking the puppies to stimulate them to urinate and defecate.

DON'T: hold a puppy in your lap and absently scratch its tummy, thereby stimulating the reflex that makes them urinate and defecate.

DO: make sure you have lots of laundry soap on hand, as well as a washer and dryer that work.

DON'T: expect to keep your clothes clean if you are going to be around the puppies.

DO: make a fuss of the bitch to encourage her to go into the whelping box and take care of her puppies.

DON'T: make a mooing sound at the bitch when you expect her to go into the whelping box to take care of her puppies.

DO: spend a lot of time talking to the puppies and looking at them, ignoring the fact that they are deaf until about 2-3 weeks of age.

DON'T: expect them to respond to all of your attention because they are deaf until they are 2-3 weeks old. NOTE: you *can* get them to pay attention to you at this stage, but only if you are lactating yourself. A neat trick if you can arrange it.



RUNAWAY MOMS:

Finally, a word about runaway moms. This usually happens when the bitch decides that the puppies are old enough to take care of themselves, about the time the puppies get their teeth. The bitch typically decides that this is a good time to go hide somewhere; however, she can start to act this way even earlier, as early as day three when the novelty of the pups has worn off. If you have a runaway mom, there are several things you can do to keep her in the whelping box:

1) You can get in the box with her and feed her and pet her as she is nursing. This is called "positive reinforcement."

2) You can yell and scream and generally annoy her until she goes into the box to get you to shut up. This is called "negative reinforcement."

3) You can chain her into place so that she can't move and only release her when the pups are full. This is called "something that works."

Actually, having a runaway mom demonstrates the circular nature of life. Before whelping, the bitch is out in the yard digging holes in which to have her litter. These holes are either in your most prized flower plots or under incredibly thorny bushes, the only way from which to extricate her is to crawl under there yourself and drag her out by her scruff. This hole digging behavior is instinctive and is designed to protect her litter. After the whelping, when she has turned into a runaway mom, she will be out there digging holes again. This behavior is instinctive and is designed to protect herself from her litter.

Well, this should help some of you novices hoping to whelp a litter of your own. I hope these hints and tips on whelping will help you survive the "miracle of birth," and keep your sanity intact, as well as your relationships with your families and in your personal and professional lives. So don't worry, and just keep on counting those placentas.