Ed Stephenson 31/03/18
Ed was eating a pie on the first tee, preparing for 18 holes, when a
sneak attack by a kookaburra deprived him of his lunch.
Ed wanted his pie very much
But a bird took it out of his clutch
I'm sorry to say
Twas the one time all day
When a birdie and Ed came in touch
Ed wanted revenge on that kooka
And to get back the pie that it tooka
He looked far and wide
But however he tried
He couldn't catch up with the fooka
Don McFarlane 17/03/18
Don hit a tree flush on, on the sixth, and it bounced back so far that
it almost hit his playing partner, Jim.
When taking his shot number three
Don doesn't like hitting a tree
He gave it a whack
It ricocheted back
And almost hit Jim on the knee
Phil Kelly 10/03/18
Phil had repeated difficulties finding his ball today, even when it
seemed like it should be readily findable.
No matter how high the wind squalls
You look for a ball where it falls
But Phil's can't be found
Like it's gone underground
In a Bermuda patch of golf balls
Tony Harding 3/02/18
Tony seemed certain to win the round, with a score of 37 off the stick.
But he got pipped by bandit Nick, with a net 29.
Scotland's a long way from Devon
And Scottsmen who golf are in heaven
Our Tony was happy
But lost and felt crappy
Despite his PB 37
Tony Harding 27/01/18
Tony came up with an irresitable dose of personal philosophy during our after-golf
Our Tony thought deeply and then he
Said something impressive to many
There are many unknowns
But you mustn't throw stones
On days when you haven't got any
Tony Harding 22/12/17
Tony has captured the story of the Dunsborough
Classic, attended by a record-sized group of GCGC members in November 2017.
The GCGC went away, to Dunsborough for a Classic Play
The stakes were
great, the golf was not – but off they went to have a shot
Bunbury, Capel, then the Lakes; and Binningup reknowned for snakes
Big thanks to Graham for the stay with stew and tandoor cauli all the
And Captain Geoff was real upbeat but baffled all with his
While Director Mal showed all his class by rarely
soaring off the grass
And Andy’s injured hand looked risky but thanks
for putting up the whiskey (still awaiting the grand opening ……)
Young Jim flew straight in from Old Dart and wished he’d brought his
And Don played steady, then he strayed, and slipped but
never was dismayed
While Tony peaked early for a fish and as a result
his golf was pi**
But Nick played well and was a grinner as he turned
out the Classic Winner!!
Nick Mayman 24/12/17
With a nod to The Man From Snowie River, Nick has
told his own version of the Dunsborough Classic story.
There was movement at the golf club for the word has
That the boys from GCGC were down in Dunsborough Town.
The Classic Cup was on and all had gathered to the fray.
tried and noted golfers from courses near and far
Had mustered at the
bush house overnight,
For golfers love hard driving where the wild
bush courses are
And a beer or two post game is a positive delight.
There was Captain who made his name with bunker shots not seen
Mal Moore came from over east with a thing or two to prove
He sort of did once he hit his groove
(along the ground).
the Overflow came down to lend a hand,
No better golfer ever waved a
The Harding man was there with his long awaited drive
slightly Asian air.
And one there was a Pommie, pale and slightly
He bore the badge of courage in his bright and fiery eye
and the proud and lofty carriage of his clubs.
But still so pale and
sweaty one would doubt his power to stay
So he waited sad and
wistful, only Malcolm stood his friend
“I warrant he’ll be with us
when we’re trudging at the end’
He hails from Mother England where
the course is wet and steep
And golfers’ feet get bogged with every
Cove was testing, more water and sand than grass
were lost, holes were dug and but it wasn’t quite a farce.
course was dire, long holes, heat and roos.
Dunsborough was however,
a complete delight
until of course lost balls in the watery
Damn the heat and damn weather,
Damn that Bidingup
Most paled, some quailed at the terror of the course
But the plucking aging Pommie swung is club around his head
He rattled down the fairway like a torrent down its bed’
It was grand to see that new Australian drive.
Now back in
The winner was announced, a newby to the club.
Some criticised his handicap and some his golfing stroke
acknowledged Captain and his arcane scoring style
And Mayman was the
winner to somewhat muted cheers.
Mal Gammon 11/11/17
shared a cart with Tony Smith, who is left handed. At one stage mal got
confused about whose clubs were whose on the back of the cart.
Mal's ball where it went left him stranded
He wasn't too pleased where it landed
His next club selection
Caused much disaffection
He'd need to have hit it left handed
Tony Harding 4/11/17
Harding tells his own story of a remarkable round, which could have been a
personal best (PB) but for one spectacularly shocking hole. In summary, he
1. Best nett
2. Nearest the pin
3. Longest drive
payout from his bet with the Captain
5. A moose (score of 10 on the 6th).
Tony H should have been full of glee
With best nett, nearest pin and LD
But on 6 he cut loose
And he carded a moose
So farewell to a likely PB
Geoff Weir 14/10/17
Harding tells the story of The Captain's struggle with numbers on the first
tee a couple of weeks back. He normally puts tees of various colours into a
hat and we draw them to determine playing groups.
The Captain's in charge of the tees
And Saturday's twelve was a breeze
Three fours was the spread
He did four threes instead
And puzzled us with his brain freeze
Nick Mayman 7/10/17
New member Nick has been fairly consistent in getting scores over 50 for 9
holes since he joined us a couple of months ago, resulting in a handicap of
17. Today, though, was pretty extraordinary, with a gross score of 42, giving
him net 25!!
Nick's handicap hit 17
thought it was honest and clean
But what if he planned it?
The underhand bandit!
The stewards will have to convene
Geoff Weir 7/10/17
One of Geoff's better rounds today.
The Captain he played in a bubble
mostly stayed right out of trouble
his round from the stars
picked up three pars
And didn't hit one single double
Tony Harding 18/03/17
Tony finished 2016 on a high, with his
handicap down at 5 (for 9 holes), but in 2017 he has seen a lot of bad luck on
the course. Today was a notable low point.
When Tony plays golf he aims high
So his troubles today made us sigh
If we speak in Roman
It might stop him groanin'
His score it was LVII
St John Kenny 11/03/17
Poor St John. He made a good start to a hole
but then got stuck in a bunker. After quite a few unsuccessful attempts to get
out of it, he resorted to flailing wildly away with his sand wedge, sending sand
The drive St John hit was a shiner
His second shot couldn't be finer
But from there it was crap
He got stuck in a trap
So he opted to dig through to China
Jim has been playing with our group for a
couple of months. This limerick is a reflection on whether he fits in. His
ability to put up with our teasing is strongly in his favour.
Our group is divided in thirds
The good, the indifferent, the turds
We're sure Jim would be
In one of those three
And he even survives our hard words