Guinness and Chips Golf Club Limericks

"Hit dum haerent descendit"

Collection of "Limericks of the Week", written at Wembley Public Golf Course on Saturday afternoons while consuming Guinness and Chips after nine arduous holes of golf.

GCGC Videos. Marvel at our high-quality swings as we each drive off the first tee.

2015 Limericks

Ed Stephenson 31/10/15

Ed's bag rolled away from him and finished up in a bunker, spilling much of its content.

Ed often hits shots that aren't planned

They're shots that his golf bag can't stand

One shot was such crap

The bag saw a trap

And threw itself into the sand

GCGC 7/09/15

44 was the number.

Four of us made 44

A strangely coincident score

Don, St John and Dave

and Tony the Brave

But definitely not Malcolm Moore

Geoff Weir 15/08/15

Geoff's tee shot on the first had unusual power.

His drive made a fine golfing sound

But Geoff's ball went left and he frowned

He waited for splash

But a branch took a bash

And half the tree fell to the ground

Malcolm Moore 2/05/15

Our course now offers foot golf. Players use soccer balls and try to kick into suitably large holes which are placed around the course. Sometimes these holes get in the way. Thanks to Tony Harding for the limerick.

At 14 the Director got seven

He thought that it really was heaven

Cos his first shot was fun

T'was his first hole in one

On footie hole number 11

Morris Kirkham 2/05/15

Tony's father in law visited again after six years. (See his previous limerick for 30/05/2009).  

Hi Morris, old son, welcome back

You're visiting us while we hack

But here is the thing

We hope you will sing

'Cos fine entertainment's your knack.

He did.


Limericks from other years: 2009 2010 2011 2012 2013 2014 2015 2016 2017

Let us pray for better golf next week.

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Limericks composed by David Pannell unless otherwise indicated.

Copyright David J. Pannell, 2009-2015
Last revised: March 12, 2017.