JOE DOLCE NEWSLETTER
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Friday December 11th, 2009
A Stone is a Stone is a Stone
"A fine quotation is a diamond in the hand of a man of wit
and a pebble in the hand of a fool."
Joseph Roux
Hi folks,
The photo above is of my grandfather on my father’s side, and my namesake, Joseph Dolce. He was an engineer for the B&O and the Fairport, Painesville and Erie Railroad ( F.P. & E.) As a small child, I remember him taking me for rides in the locomotive engine room. He would sit me on a seat near him while he steered the train. I never bothered to mention to grandpa that we kids used to also flatten coins on the tracks hoping one day to detrail one of these choo-choos. Fortunately, it never happened but you got to love kids.
Hey, some fool put the B-Side to ‘Shaddap You Face’ on youTube. The flipside was an early song I wrote called ‘Ain’t in No Hurry.’ I had forgotten about this track as it resulted in an ugly litigation with an ex-publisher penishead from the States, who I stupidly forgotten controlled the rights to it from back when I was in my 20s. I had to sue the bastahd to get his bloodsucking claws out of my neck. He even thought he might even have some claim on the A-side, too, but I hired Bruce Springsteen’s New York lawyer who advised me to ‘hit him in the stomach and negotiate in the hospital’ and we filed a fraud suit against him. Anyway, I havent heard the song for twenty years and it still sounds pretty good. There some nice guitar and blues harp work in it, Lin Van Hek is also singing the harmony (one of our first recordings together - this was back in 1980!) and there’s a funny rave in the middle. Click on the link and go in about 3:15 to get to the ‘big B-side’.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkD1ptUdz8s
Next week, Gaudies and Lentilmen, will be my annual Christmas Newsletter. And then a break for a week or so while I put together my usual Ikea Christmas gifts. I optioned sending the newsletter out on Christmas Day, Friday Dec 25th, but who wants to read a blinkin’ newsletter in between cracking presents? Not me. So this is the last call for any ridiculous Christmas themed stories, jokes, poems or suspected corruption at the North Pole. We WILL publish the truth about the Man in Red.
A couple of articles this week are taken from ‘Poetry X’, a US website devoted to reading, analyzing, and discussing classic and contemporary poetry. This site seems somewhat abandoned as it hasn’t been updated since 2006 but its impressive archive is fascinating to surf through.
http://poetryx.com/
James Cameron’s long awaited new sci-fi epic ‘AVATAR’, opens next week. The 3-D version at IMAX. Here is an extended trailer:
http://cinemarv.com/avatar-trailer/
FAVOURITE LETTERS OF THE WEEK
Hi there Joe,
RE: JIMI HENDRIX
Did you know Apu'u, Jimi Hendrix's son, who is in Electric Church, lives in Melbourne... His Mum is american indian and somehow he's said to be even more amazing than his dad... you can see him gig in Melbourne! xxx Kavisha
(Note: This sounds very interesting, folks, but I can find no reference to Apu’u as Jimi’s son - or even the band online. It’s said that Hendrix had two children. One was a girl born around 1966. Her name was Tamika Laurence James Carpenter and her mother, Diane Carpenter, an African-American, was from from Minnesota. Diane became a born again Christian in 1974, four years after Jimi died. Here is her website:
http://www.queenscorner.com/author.htm
The second child, a boy born in 1969, was with Eva Sundqvist (Sweden), and his name was James Daniel Sundqvist (born as Jimi Hendrix Jr. but changed his name when he found out who his dad was.) There is alleged to have been quite a bit of litigation between the son and the grandfather about the rightful heir to Jimi’s estate. No mention of anyone named Apu’u but perhaps the kid changed his name again. If anyone knows more, or has website details of how to find this band in Melbourne, forward the information.)
THE RED JEEP
While artists-in-residence and artistic directors for the Denmark Brave New Works Festival 15, in 2008, Lin Van Hek and I had the pleasure to reacquaint ourselves with Andre Steyl, whom we worked with during Difficult Women’s first tour of Western Australia, in the 90s. Andre has made a short youTube video about his one-of-a-kind car. In his own words:
‘The International Day of People With Disability held on Nov 3rd, prompted me to make this movie about my red jeep which is steered with my left foot. I hope it inspires others to be innovative and dream of another way. Thanks to Joe Dolce for the few bars of music at start and finish ripped from ‘Nuclear Junkman’ on this cd "Memoirs of a Mouth Organ" and thanks to Tim for his innovative hand-held camera work and Hugh for voices and encouragement.’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suIVXrRDjng
Honeymoon in Kabul
Honeymoon in Kabul beat a host of films from six continents to take out the audience choice award at the Zero Film Festival in Los Angeles on Monday. Follow newly weds clown doctor Jean-Paul Bell and his wife Maggie Haertsch as they venture into Afghanistan to donate medical aid and humour - only to discover the politics of foriegn aid are as complex as any second marriage! I remember working with Jean-Paul many times back in the 80s and it is good to see him making good use of the old ‘paper bag’ trick which I have been amusing my own grandkids with for years.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSCWVTjMwos
The Clown Doctor concept, which involves belly-laugh humour as part of the healing process, was conceived of by PATCH ADAMS, from the US, one of the Ian Gawler Institute extended network of alternative doctors. Before Robin Williams played PATCH in the movie of the same name, Adams came to Australia and gave a demonstration and talk at Dallas Brooks Hall. He also traveled to Afghanistan.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6b7gIb2GT9k
RARE BEATLES FOOTAGE & RECORDINGS
Here’s a collection of unusual Beatles films & recordings that I hadn’t seen before. There’s lots more out there but here’s some I liked.
John Lennon singing Lady Marmalade
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HzLPO6FR6I
Soldier of Love - The Beatles
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8iLwwac4i4
The Beatles - Not Guilty
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uTsbBWBzcc
The Beatles - Child Of Nature
The forerunner to ‘Jealous Guy’.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TokHBjAcw5s
Beatles Live @ The Cavern ‘Some Other Guy’
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsoIv6F8sUg
I'll Be On My Way
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTlKfOMN9rA
The Beatles - Real Love
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcXodsQ71J4
The Beatles - Beautiful Dreamer - Rare Live Recording
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7INEy-yoeg
The Beatles – Yes It Is
Rough demo.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnnqLmSzTNE
- And a few extras just for fun:
John Lennon's Parody of Bob Dylan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bvVdAmYfXI
Bob Dylan: I Am The Walrus
Don’t Look Back . . . at the Eggman.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vtcp4aFDm-4
What I’m Reading This Week
The Best Australian Poems 2005 & 2009. Two excellent collections: the first is edited by Les Murray and the second, by Robert Adamson. It’s heart-warming to see so many of my friends represented: Ashlley Morgan-Shae (‘Tulip’ 2005), Dorothy Porter (‘Travel’ 2009), Josephine Rowe (‘In the Boot of Someone’s Car’ 2005), Adrienne Eberhard (‘The Maze’ 2009) and Susan Hawthorn (‘Climate change: yugantameghaha’ 2009).
Sharon Olds. A selection of poems, and literary criticism about her work that I gathered from the internet. Most people love Olds; some hate her with a passion. I have a couple of her books and I personally like reading her, even when she falls overboard. But if you want to see a scathing and negative critique of her work, that will make you (and me) think twice before ever criticizing another artist in this way, read Dan Schneider’s 2002 essay, ‘Sharon Old’s Orifices & The Inculation of Tedium’. eg. “She is a very imitative poet—can anyone say ‘5th rate Sylvia Plath, 40 years too late’?” Easy Dan, it’s only poetry:
http://articles.poetryx.com/26/
What I’m Watching This Week
The Great Global Warming Swindle - a documentary film that argues against the mainstream of scientific consensus on climate change that global warming is "very likely due to the observed increase in anthropogenic (man-made) greenhouse gas concentrations". It has been described by both its original broadcaster Channel 4 and the British regulator Ofcom as "a polemic".
The film, made by British television producer Martin Durkin, showcases scientists, economists, politicians, writers, and others who are sceptical about the scientific theory of anthropogenic global warming. The programme's publicity materials assert that man-made global warming is "a lie" and "the biggest scam of modern times." Its original working title was "Apocalypse my arse", but the title The Great Global Warming Swindle was later adopted as a reference to The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle, a mockumentary about British punk band The Sex Pistols.
The UK's Channel 4 premiered the documentary on 8 March 2007. The channel described the film as "a polemic that drew together the well-documented views of a number of respected scientists to reach the same conclusions. This is a controversial film but we feel that it is important that all sides of the debate are aired.” According to Hamish Mykura, Channel 4's head of documentaries, the film was commissioned "to present the viewpoint of the small minority of scientists who do not believe global warming is caused by anthropogenic production of carbon dioxide." Although the documentary was welcomed by global warming sceptics, it was criticised heavily by many scientific organisations and individual scientists (including two of the film's contributors). The film's critics argued that it had misused and fabricated data, relied on out-of-date research, employed misleading arguments, and misrepresented the position of the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. Channel 4 and Wag TV (the production company) accepted some of the criticism, correcting a few errors in subsequent releases. However according to Bob Ward (former spokesman for the Royal Society), this still left five out of seven of the errors and misleading arguments which had been previously attacked by him and 36 other scientists in an open letter. . . (more)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Great_Global_Warming_Swindle
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5576670191369613647#docid=-1230362532304927339
(thanks to Pam Hanna)
The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency
Executive producer Anthony Minghella directed the episode and co-wrote the adaptation based on a series of ten novels by British author Alexander McCall Smith. The agency is located in Gaborone, capital of Botswana. Its founder is a Motswana woman, Mma Precious Ramotswe, who features as the stories' protagonist and main detective.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ladies/
The Cove - documentary directed by former National Geographic photographer Louie Psihoyos and portions were filmed secretly during 2007 using underwater microphones and high-definition cameras disguised as rocks in an extremely dangerous, almost SAS series of midnight operations. The documentary won the U.S. Audience Award at the 25th annual Sundance Film Festival in January 2009. It has also been shortlisted for an Oscar nomination at the 2010 Academy Awards. The movie follows Ric O'Barry's quest to document the dolphin hunting operations in a restricted area of Taiji, Wakayama, Japan. Former dolphin trainer turned activist O'Barry was the man who captured and trained the five wild dolphins who would play the role of "Flipper" in the hit television series of the same name back in the 60s. This pop-culture phenomenon fueled widespread public adoration of dolphins. It was when one of the dolphins committed a form of suicide in his arms, closing her blowhole voluntarily in order to suffocate, that O'Barry came to see it as a curse not a blessing. Days later, he found himself off the island of Bimini, attempting to cut a hole in the sea pen in order to set free a captured dolphin. Since then O'Barry has worked tirelessly as an advocate on behalf of dolphins around the world. (adapted from wikipedia)
What I’m Listening to This Week
Black Mountain Blues, by Bessie Smith.
Lascia Ch'io Pianga, by Yoshikazu Mera.
A MEMOIR OF EDGAR ALLEN POE
“a swift runner, a wonderful leaper, and, what was more rare, a boxer, with some slight training…. He would allow the strongest boy in the school to strike him with full force in the chest. He taught me the secret, and I imitated him, after my measure. It was to inflate the lungs to the uttermost, and at the moment of receiving the blow to exhale the air. It looked surprising, and was, indeed, a little rough; but with a good breast-bone, and some resolution, it was not difficult to stand it. For swimming he was noted, being in many of his athletic proclivities surprisingly like Byron in his youth.” Colonel T. L. Preston, fellow pupil.
http://articles.poetryx.com/63/
USA Turkey Testicle Festival
Jamie Oliver missed in his recent tour stateside.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CNf9t8R-Zwo
(thanks to Frank Dolce)
(Special thanks to Domenica Leone for the newspaper clipping.)
NEW YORK MUSEUM OF SEX
The Museum’s permanent collection of over 15,000 artifacts is comprised of works of art, photography, clothing and costumes, technological inventions and historical ephemera. Additionally, the museum houses both a research library as well as an extensive multimedia library, which includes 8mm, Super 8mm, 16mm, BETA, VHS and DVDs. From fine art to historical ephemera to film, the Museum of Sex preserves an ever-growing collection of sexually related objects that would otherwise be destroyed and discarded due to their sexual content.
Example of typical exhibition:
RUBBERS features artifacts that cover the gamut from vintage photographs of sexual transmitted diseases to military signage campaigning for the sexual safety of soldiers to a wide array of antique condoms, tins, and dispensers. Highlights of the exhibition include conceptual art pieces such as the cruel condom, a condom crafted entirely out of chainmail and covered with spikes and Franco B’s resin condom sculpture assembled from gritty used condoms taken from the floor and trash of the infamous FIST nightclub in London. The exhibition also includes the marriage of function and fashion with the inclusion of Adriana Bertini’s couture condom cocktail dress, made from 1200 hand dyed condoms and fashioned after the Valentino dresses of the 1960s, trendy and contemporary condoms from renowned designers such as Marc Jacobs, as well as “condiments,” functional salt and pepper shakers designed and molded after condoms.
http://www.museumofsex.com/
(Note: The following should be included in the above.)
Spike Milligan's Weather Forecast
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HeUjuZ0p78M
~ FAMOUS DOLCES OF THE WORLD ~
Who You Gonna Call?
Jimmy Dolce
Detective at New York City Police Department
Canine Handler
Executive Protection at ABC- Good Morning America
http://www.linkedin.com/pub/jimmy-dolce/10/303/73
RECIPE
Florentine Roast Pork, on Fennel, with Double-Cream Gravy
3 large fennel bulbs
½ table finely chopped rosemary
4 garlic cloves, crushed
1.5 kg pork loin, with crackle, scored
3 white onions
90 ml olive oil
185 ml dry white wine
80 ml extra virgin olive oil
250 ml chicken stock
4 tables double cream
Pre-heat over to 200C (400 F/Gas 6). Cut the green fronds from the tops of the fennel and chop to give 2 tbles. Mix with the rosemary, garlic, and plenty of salt and black pepper. Make deep incisions with a sharp knife allover the pork and rub this mixture into the incisions and the splits in the pork bone. Cut two of the onions in half and place in a roasting tin. Put the pork on top of the onion and drizzle the olive oil over the top.
Roast in the oven for 30 minutes. Baste the pork with the pan juices, and then reduce the temperature to 180C (350F/Gas 4). Roast for a further 30 minutes. Baste and lightly salt the surface of the pork. Pour in half the white wine. Continue roasting for another 30-45 minutes, basting once or twice.
Remove the tough outer leaves of the fennel and discard. Slice the bulbs vertically into 1 cm sections and place in a large saucepan. Thinly slice the remaining onion and add to the saucepan with the extra virgin olive oil.
About an hour before the pork is ready, put the lid on the pan of fennel and bring to the boil. Simmer for about 45 minutes, or until the fennel is creamy and soft and almost all the liquid has evaporated.
Remove the pork from the tin and leave to rest in a warm spot. Spoon off the excess oil from the tin and discard the onions. Place the tin over high heat on the stovetop and stir in the remaining wine to deglaze. Add the stock and boil the sauce until slightly thickened. Remove from the heat, season with salt and pepper and stir in the cream. Slice the pork and serve on the fennel with the sauce.
A pan of roasted potatoes, carrots and pumpkin goes well as a side dish.
MY SON THE MAN
Suddenly his shoulders get a lot wider,
the way Houdini would expand his body
while people were putting him in chains. It seems
no time since I would help him to put on his sleeper,
guide his calves into the gold interior,
zip him up and toss him up and
catch his weight. I cannot imagine him
no longer a child, and I know I must get ready,
get over my fear of men now my son
is going to be one. This was not
what I had in mind when he pressed up through me like a
sealed trunk through the ice of the Hudson,
snapped the padlock, unsnaked the chains,
and appeared in my arms. Now he looks at me
the way Houdini studied a box
to learn the way out, then smiled and let himself be manacled.
~ by Sharon Olds ~
(from THE WELLSPRING)
THE FINAL HURRAH
AUSTRALIAN RULES FOOTBALL
(For US readers, forget it. You probably won’t get this – you have to live here. But I’m sure you could substitute your own local favourite.)
50,000 Collingwood Fans
50,000 Collingwood Fans meet at the MCG for a "Collingwood Fans Are Not Stupid" Convention.
Eddie says, "We are all here today to prove to the world that Collingwood Fans are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer."
Anthony Rocca gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage.
Eddie asks him, "What is fifteen plus fifteen?"
After 15 or 20 seconds Rocca says, "Eighteen!"
Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then all 50,000 Collingwood Fans start chanting, "GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!"
Eddie says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 50,000 of you in one place and we have the world wide press and global broadcast media here, I think we can give him other chance."
So he asks, "What is seven plus seven?"
After nearly 30 seconds he eventually says, "Ninety!"
Eddie is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh everyone is disheartened.
Rocca starts crying and the 50,000 Collingwood Fans begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, "GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!"
Eddie, unsure whether or not he is doing more harm than good, eventually says, "OK! OK! Just one more chance...What is two plus two?"
Rocca closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, "Four!"
Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 50,000 Collingwood Fans jump to their feet, wave their arms, stamp their feet and scream...
"GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!"
(thanks to Paul Roberts)
