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October 25th, 2003

The Genesis Teether

 

"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
-
Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)

 

Hi folks,

George W Bush visited Australian Parliament this week and got a good dose of Aussie-style heckling including 41 Opposition party members signing a letter criticizing Bush's war decision, saying: 'No clear and present danger existed'. Howard introduced the Bush-wacko with the words, 'We have a divided view in this nation on Iraq.' You better believe it, John. Thousands of anti-war demonstrators protested outside the building. Thousands more in their hearts.

[Saddam] "built up a massive war machine while neglecting the basic needs of his own people."
-
George W. Bush, October 11, 2003

Hmmm...that sounds like the basic story of the current US economy, to me.

El Presidente Bushstro asked, 'Who can possibly think that the world would be better off with Saddam Hussein still in power?' Let me respond to that typical George W Bozo remark with: 'Who could possibly think that the world would not be better off with the 10,000 innocent victims of this atrocity still alive and breathing, rather than dead and covered in dirt?'

And we haven't even caught Saddam Hussein yet, much less Bin Laden, fool.

In my opinion, the world would be a lot better off with a LOT of people out of power (starting with George W) but ever since the beginning of recorded history there has been the hard slog of politics and government. Certain meglo-maniacs arise in every century who think they can put the quick-fix on other cultures and get them 'with the program' on the fast track. Christians stealing Aboriginal and Native-American children, for instance. This 'fastfood' approach to Freedom and Right-thinking has never worked and will never work. It only spawns hatred, distrust and the desire for revenge down the track.

Arghhhhh! Spit, venom, poison, vomit, puke and four letter words . . . . .

George Bush Senior, on Iraq

In his memoirs, "A World Transformed," written in 1998, George Bush, Senior, wrote the following to explain why he didn't go after Saddam Hussein at the end of the Gulf War:

"Trying to eliminate Saddam ... would have incurred incalculable human and political costs. Apprehending him was probably impossible.... We would have been forced to occupy Baghdad and, in effect, rule Iraq.... there was no viable "exit strategy" we could see, violating another of our principles. Furthermore, we had been consciously trying to set a pattern for handling
aggression in the post-Cold War world. Going in and occupying Iraq, thus unilaterally exceeding the United Nations' mandate, would have destroyed the precedent of international response to aggression that we hoped to establish. Had we gone the invasion route, the United States could
conceivably still be an occupying power in a bitterly hostile land."

If only his son could read. (more)
(Thanks to John Jacobs.)
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Now, for some Light! Be calm, O soul . . . . . . . .

THE GANDHI PEACE AWARD

Democratic candidate-of-choice for President, Dennis Kucinich, is the 2003 recipient of The Gandhi Peace Award. Some former recipients have been: Eleanor Roosevelt, Dr. Linus C. Pauling, Dr. Benjamin Spock, U Thant, Dorothy Day, Dr. Daniel Ellsberg and Cesar Chavez . (Anyone of which would make a better leader than Bush so Dennis is in good company.) The Gandhi Peace Award

From a recent speech of Kucinich's:

" I am running for President of the United States to challenge this system which traps so many Americans, children and adults, in fear, in violence and poverty and makes us pay for wars we don't want and causes us to sacrifice our children's future. . . .
. . .we must heal America from the pain and the suffering and the fear of 9/11 which, unfortunately, led this administration to attack a nation which did not attack us, and to pass a Patriot bill which undermines our civil liberties. America stands strongest in challenging terrorism when we do not give up an inch of our civil liberties, and when we cooperate with the world community in matters of international security. I ask you: how can we afford to be the policemen of the world, when we can't afford to hire police, firefighters . . . back here at home in our cities?
That is why this week I will be present in Congress to vote against funding 87 billion dollars for the occupation of Iraq. I am running for President of the United States to end the United States occupation of Iraq, and put an end to the lies which brought us into Iraq, and to help make this country whole again in the world community and to challenge those lies which, if left unchallenged, will cause this administration to lead this country into another war. We must challenge those lies! I am running for President of the United States to stop the hundreds of billions of our tax dollars from going towards the continued occupation of Iraq. . . " www.kucinich.us/

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Here's a couple of short comments regarding last week's newsletter:

"Good stuff, Joe,
A little bit of historical trivia: Will Rogers was a native American.
Abraham Lincoln earned his Captain's stripes as an Indian fighter( killed heaps in village raids) in the US army.
Toss (Coolagolite)

and this:

" You know I was only talking to a mate of mine about JOE DOLCE some weeks ago and He was convinced Joe had killed himself......He needs to let people know he is still around. I LOVED That song!!!!!    I would love to find it again.
William

(Note: What song could he possibly be referring to? I'm not dead at the time of writing this but it's possible I could be by the time you read it. If so, the quote that I end this newsletter with should suffice.)

Cold Pizza

One of my songs, 'Pizza Pizza,' the theme song for the US Pizza Team, was featured this past week, when Joe Carlucci, a member of the 2004 U.S. Pizza Team, appeared on US television's ESPN2's new morning show, Cold Pizza, and demonstrated freestyle dough tossing. Carlucci placed first at the Acrobatic Trials in Los Angeles in August and will go to Italy to compete in the World Pizza Championship in March. He is the owner of Carlucci's in Bethel, Conn.
For more information on the U.S. Pizza Team visit: www.uspizzateam.com

(thanks to Steve Green - www.pmq.com/)

POSITION WANTED: GEORGE W. BUSH INVITED BY JOE DOLCE TO CHEERLEAD FOR THE US PIZZA TEAM

George W. Bush used to be a cheerleader when he went to Philips Andover Academy. I'd love to see George Jr. get his old outfit on once more and lead a few cheers for Joe Carlucci when he competes next year in Italy. I think Dubya would be more convincing in a well-worn Monica Lewinski-stained cheerleading skirt then in a brand new never-used flight suit, don't you? Here's a bio for King George the Stutterer that you may not have seen before: bio

(If anyone wants to hear or order a copy of 'Pizza Pizza', here's where it can be done.)

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NATIONAL RIFLE ASSOCIATION

 

Stop sign on dirt road
Taunts me with its brand new face
Hand me my damn gun.
Mullet Haiku, by Mark Morford

 

The National Rifle Association has a 19 page list of all individuals and organizations who " ...have lent monetary, grassroots or some other type of direct support to anti-gun organizations." Have a look who's on their Hit List. (I noticed that Michael Moore was conspicuously absent.) NRA BLACKLIST

To add YOUR name to this prestigious list (and probably make yourself a target!), go here and sign up: SIGN UP

Or, do as Mark Morford suggests:

You want to be on the NRA's list, even if you're not famous? You want to be an honorary member, in spirit, right alongside Maya Angelou and Jack Nicholson and the Kansas City Royals? It's easy!

Here's how:

-- Laugh at fear. First and foremost. The NRA really, really hates this, when you are not afraid of "furriners" or gangbangers or drug dealers sneaking into your suburban home at any moment to molest your goldfish and hold a sari to your head and make you praise Vishnu.

-- Refuse myopia. It ain't Us vs. Them. It ain't Guns vs. Hugs. It ain't Kill -'em-all vs. Can't-we-just-be-friends. No one says skeet shootin' ain't fun. No one is trying to take all the guns away. Just the ones that shoot 100 rounds per second and can take out a tank at one mile and can wipe out a playground full of screaming kids in eight seconds.

-- Make a note of how in one recent year, guns murdered four people in New Zealand, 19 in Japan, 54 in England, 57 in Australia, 66 in Switzerland, 151 in Canada, 373 in Germany, and 11,798 in the U.S. Note how the NRA hates stats like this. Send this note to all your friends, using the subject line: "Fun data to toss around at a GOP party or when scoring Vicodin for Rush Limbaugh."

-- Applaud loudly at the end of "Bowling for Columbine," which does more to bind the NRA to America's culture of fear and hate than any movie in history, and makes former NRA chief Charlton Heston look far less like a macho gun-gropin' hero to be cheered, and more like a sad, woefully uninformed curmudgeon to be pitied.

-- Note, finally, that the NRA blacklist is positively teeming with people and organizations that do tremendous good in the world, poets and artists and comedians and healers, promoters of peace and well-being and education. Choose to become one of them, participate in the culture of creation and juicy positivism as opposed to one of fear and ammo and a warped vision of the U.S. as this modern, hyperviolent gun-totin' Wild West.

Voilà! -- the NRA will automatically assume you are a vile tofu-suckin' liberal threat to the sanctity of deadly handheld weaponry, and, much like the vast majority of the positive and less gun-obsessed world already is, you'll be on the list in no time. And, really, who wouldn't want to be?
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We Are Not Creepy Inbred Hillbillies, Say Creepy Inbred Hillbillies

"A federal prosecutor apologized for describing some potential jurors in the mountain region of eastern Kentucky as "illiterate cave dwellers." Assistant U.S. Attorney Kenneth Taylor offered the apology in the Appalachian News-Express, a newspaper printed largely on scraps of rancid animal skin using ink derived from the brains of cooked squirrels and rutabaga root, and which employs a loose system of simple pictures and symbols and arrows and handfuls of pygmy monkey teeth to relay its stories, and is delivered to the quivery Appalachian mountain people by way of a team of partially lobotomized wild pigs each named after local high school football teams and/or squirrel brain cookie recipes. "The comment was not meant to be a regional slur," Taylor said, as an Appalachian interpreter squatted on all fours nearby and screamed in some guttural language and flagellated herself with the entrails of a donkey and laughed hysterically before passing out. " article (thanks to Mark Morford)
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THE GENESIS TEETHER
Baby Teething Ring


The Genesis Teether™ is a great way for Christian people to show their faith in Jesus. It gives other people a good visual about your beliefs and is a good testimonial as a gift to new parents. Plant a seed in new parents about Jesus. (Note: Check this little accessory out. HEY! MAYBE IT COULD BE THE SYMBOL I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR TO REPLACE THE CRUCIFIX!) (more)
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for the kids:
TINY LITTLE SCARY STORY

A little boy and an older man are taking a walk through the woods when the sun starts to go down.
The little boy looks up at the man and says, "Mister, it's getting dark in these woods, I'm scared."
"You're scared!?" the man replies, "how do you think I feel? I have to walk out of these woods alone!"
--------------------

JOKE

A married couple went to he hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the father.
He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it. The doctor set the pain transfer dial to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.
But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and bump it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing.
At this point they decided to try for 50%.
The husband continued to feel quite well. Since it was obviously helping out his wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain.
She and her husband were ecstatic. When they got home, the husband's best friend was dead on their porch.

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A FEW OF GOVERNOR 'ARNOLD THE SWARTZ'S' MORE MEMORABLE QUOTES:

"The best activities for your health are pumping and humping."

"Having a pump is like having sex. I train two, sometimes three times a day. Each time I get a pump. It's great. I feel like I'm coming all day.

"I think that gay marriage should be between a man and a woman."

"I can look at a chick who's a little out of shape and if she turns me on, I won't hesitate to date her. If she's a good f**k she can weigh 150 pounds, I don't care." - in a 1977 interview with Oui.

"The c**k isn't a muscle so it doesn't grow in relation to the shoulders, say, or the pectorals. You can't make it bigger through exercise, that's for sure."

"Nixon was always being attacked sexually. It was always said that he was a fag and that he had no sexual relations with his wife for 15 years and that was why he liked power. And Hitler had only one ball, and that was why he wanted to conquer the world." - in a 1977 interview with Time Out.

"My friends don't want me to mention Kurt's name, because of all the recent Nazi stuff and the U.N. controversy, but I love him and Maria does too, and so thank you, Kurt." ­ on his friend and fellow Austrian Kurt Waldheim, a Nazi war criminal.

(Note: A little refresher course may be in order here. Kurt Waldheim, a widely esteemed former secretary general of the United Nations, was running for president of Austria in March 1986 when it came to light that he had participated in Nazi atrocities during World War II. Waldheim had always maintained that he had served in the Wehrmacht only briefly and that after being wounded early in the war, he had returned to Vienna to attend law school. In fact, Waldheim had resumed military service after recuperating from his injury and had been an intelligence officer in Germany's Army Group E when it committed mass murder in the Kozara region of western Bosnia. (Waldheim's name appears on the Wehrmacht's "honor list" of those responsible for the atrocity.) In 1944, Waldheim had reviewed and approved a packet of anti-Semitic propaganda leaflets to be dropped behind Russian lines, one of which ended, "enough of the Jewish war, kill the Jews, come over." After the war, Waldheim was wanted for war crimes by the War Crimes Commission of the United Nations, the very organization he would later head. None of these revelations prevented Waldheim from winning the Austrian election, but after he became president, the U.S. Justice Department put Waldheim on its watch list denying entry to "any foreign national who assisted or otherwise participated in activities amounting to persecution during World War II." The international community largely shunned Waldheim, and he didn't run for re-election. (This information comes from the1992 book Betrayal: The Untold Story of the Kurt Waldheim Investigation and Cover-Up, by Eli M. Rosenbaum and William Hoffer.)

SOUNDBYTES of Arnies favourite one-liners:

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Hollywood Squares

These are from the old Hollywood Squares in the days when game show responses were spontaneous and unscripted, not like they are now.

Q: If you're going to make a parachute jump, you should be at least how high?
A: Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q: True or false...a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A: George Gobel: Boy it sure seems that way sometimes . . .

Q: You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A: Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

Q: According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at party and you think he's really attractive, is it okay to come out directly and ask him if he's married?
A: Rose Marie: No, wait until morning.

Q: What are "Do It," "I Can Help" and "Can't Get Enough"?
A: George Gobel: I don't know but it's coming from the next apartment.

Q: Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A: Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q: Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during your first year?
A: Charley Weaver: Of course not, Peter. I'm too busy growing strawberries!

Q: It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics. What is the other?
A: Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q: When you pat a dog on its head he will usually wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A: Paul Lynde: Make him bark.

Q: If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A: Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q: According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A: Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army!

Q: Is it possible for the puppies in a litter to have more than one daddy?
A: Paul Lynde: Why, that bitch!

Q: While visiting China, your tour guide starts shouting "Poo! Poo! Poo!" What does that mean?
A: George Goebel: Cattle crossing.

Q: Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A: George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q: When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for it's sex?
A: Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car. The rest is up to him.

Q: Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A: Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q: Imagine you are a child in your mother's womb, can you detect light?
A: Paul Lynde: Only during ballet practice.
(thanks to Maireid Sullivan.)

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FILM RECOMMENDATION

Bonhoeffer

Martin Doblmeier's Bonhoeffer is a riveting documentary about Protestant theologian Dietrich Bonhoeffer who courageously challenged the Third Reich in his teachings and in his participation in a secret plot to kill Adolf Hitler. Very spiritually uplifting and appropriate for our current times as well.

Bonhoeffer visited Adam Clayton Powell Sr. at his Baptist church in Harlem during the '40s and was blown away by the gospel interpretations he heard there and took recordings back to Germany and taught the songs to his community choir.

He was one of the only German religious leaders to stand against Hitler publicly from day one and was eventually killed for his beliefs, in the final year of the war. His philosophy and writings were very influential on Martin Luther King Jr.

The film is also a must see for anyone who is haunted by the question of where the German conscience was during the Holocaust. www.bonhoeffer.com

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Princess Diana Letter

LONDON (AP) - A letter reportedly written by Princess Diana expressing fears that someone was plotting to eliminate her by tampering with the brakes of her car brought the painful story of her death back to the front pages Monday and prompted a call for a public inquiry.

The Daily Mirror said Diana wrote the letter to her butler Paul Burrell in October 1996 - some 11 months before the Paris car crash that killed the princess, her companion Dodi Fayed and the car's driver, Henri Paul.

Fayed's father, Mohammed al Fayed - who has long contended the crash was part of a plot to kill the couple and not an accident - called on Prime Minister Tony Blair to hold a full and independent public inquiry or stand accused of colluding in a cover-up.

The letter confirmed ``the suspicions I have so often voiced in public and which have thus far been ignored,'' al Fayed, the owner of Harrods department store, said in a statement. (article)

Princess Diana's Sons Speak Out

LONDON (AP) - Princess Diana's sons implored her former butler Friday to stop revealing secrets of her private life, calling a series of gossipy tabloid articles a 'cold and overt betrayal' of their late mother.

In an unusually emotional written statement, 21-year-old William said Diana would have been mortified by Paul Burrell's revelations. He said he also spoke on behalf of his 19-year-old brother, Harry.

Burrell has written a book about Diana, ' A Royal Duty,' which has been excerpted all week in the Daily Mirror tabloid.

In a statement issued through his publisher Penguin, Burrell said he was saddened by the princes' statement, ' . . . because I know that this book is nothing more than a tribute to their mother.'

' My only intention in writing this book was to defend the princess and stand in her corner,' Burrell said. (article)

(Ed Note: I wrote a song called 'Ode to Diana,' the day following Diana's death, which I included on my CD 'Memoirs of a Mouth Organ,' -
LYRICS (Contains a great photo of Diana doing yoga.) ORDER CD
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RECIPE

Risotto Con Funghi in Flagrante Delicto

c.1500, "resplendent," from Medieval Latin,. flagrantem (nom. flagrans) "burning," prp. of flagrare "to burn," from L. root *flag-, corresponding to PIE *bhleg- (cf. Gk. phlegein "to burn, scorch," O.E. blæc "black"). Sense of "glaringly offensive" first recorded 1706, probably from common legalese phrase in flagrante delicto "red-handed," lit. "with the crime still blazing," also: in the midst of sexual activity.

ingredients:

2 cups Carnaroli rice (Carnaroli rice has a fantastic flavour so try to find that particular brand. It costs more but it makes all the difference.)
1 cup white wine
I litre hot chicken stock
half packet dried porcini mushrooms
2 cloves of garlic, quartered
1 small chunk pancetta, chopped
1/2 teas chopped fresh red chilli
olive oil
parsely, finely chopped
1 cup grated parmesean cheese
25 grams butter
salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 naked people

method:
Begin with about 20 minutes of passionate loving foreplay and tongue kissing (for older people, drooling is ok.) Now you must . . . pause . . . in the tantric manner . . . . hold that thought . . . . while you -

Soak the dried mushrooms in about a half cup of warm water.
Heat some oil and add the chopped pancetta (for flavouring the rice) . Cook until crisp and remove pancetta with a slotted spoon. Throw in the garlic, stir and then add the carnoli rice. Stir the rice thorougly and cook for a minute until coated with the oil. Add the white wine and cook for 2 minutes until alcohol has evaporated a little. Add chilli and 1/3 of the parsely, and stir. Gradually add chicken stock a cup at a time, continually stirring until absorbed. This is a full concentration dish so you have to stay there and keep stirring as the rice absorbs the stock. Keep adding stock until the rice has acquired an 'al dente' texture. This will probably take about 30 minutes of attention. Drain the mushrooms and add the water to the rice and stir. When the rice has reached the desired consistancy, remove it from the heat, stir in the butter, half the parmesan cheese, 1/3 of the parsley, the rehydrated mushrooms, salt and pepper, stir thoroughly, cover and let rest for ten minutes. Set the timer.

Have some quick sex, using whatever Italian words you know. When the timer goes off, stop wherever you are and have dinner.

Serve the risotto with fresh parsely, parmesan cheese and freshly grated pepper.

After dinner, either finish your sex, watch a video or else go to sleep on the couch. (This probably depends on how much of the dinner you've eaten.)

RIP JIM CAIRNS

Australian politician and Peace Activist, Jim Cairns, passed away recently. I remember having a few interesting talks with him at the Camberwell Market about Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr, two people he greatly admired. He was above all a philosopher and the first reading at his funeral was the following:

 

"Death is nothing at all ... I have only slipped away into the next room.. I am I, and you are you.. Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Call me by my old familiar name, speak to me in the easy way you always used to. Put no difference in to your tone; wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household name it always was. Let it be spoken without effort, without the ghost of a shadow on it. Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was; there is absolutely unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near just around the corner.. All is well. Nothing is past; nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before... only better, infinitely happier and for ever. . . . "
attributed to: Helen Steiner Rice
(thanks to stefan abeysekera)

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