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Friday September 19th, 2008


   There may be said to be two classes of people in the world;
    those who constantly divide the people of the world into two classes,
    and those who do not.
Robert Benchley

Hi folks,

Everyone has heard the story how The Beatles chose their name in honour of Buddy Holly and The Crickets. And probably you are aware that John and Paul were both strongly influenced by the 1953 film, The Wild One, with Marlon Brando, which led to their original leather-coated German-period look.  But there’s an unconscious influence on why they may have chosen that particular band name: one of the motorcycle gangs in The Wild One was called: The Beetles.

Yet again, talk is in the air of Australia becoming a Republic. You know what that means. The possibility that, once again, ‘Shaddap You Face’ might be chosen as the new Australian National Anthem.  Shaddap Australia Fair.  One can always dream.  A black man as President of the USA.  A woman Prime Minister of England.  The National Anthem sung in Broken English. The downside of a republic, of course, is that I would no longer have the hope of becoming Sir Joseph Dolce, like Elgar. But that’s ok. As long as I got a sheep station, an annuity and my picture on a stamp. The little things make me happy.  But life would certainly change in Australian daily life. No more letters from the Queen on your One Hundredth Birthday.  But on the positive side, the Vietnamese restaurants could finally start putting grilled Corgis on the menu.  Compulsory internment camps for the Brits.  Emperor Gough Whitlam could return from exile.  Even Harold Holt might swim home.  Maybe a Disneyland in Canberra. (Sorry I forgot, there’s already one there. It’s called the government.) It might be time for me to take a more active role in this drive towards a Republic. I could shave my head like Gandhi and lead a sea salt march to St Kilda Beach to speed things up.  Bapu Giuesppe.  Shaddapagraha.

Australian Republic Plans Boosted by Party Leader Switch
SYDNEY (AFP) - The chances of Australia dumping the British monarch as head of state firmed Tuesday as a staunch republican was elected leader of the opposition, Prime Minister Kevin Rudd indicated. Millionaire former lawyer and merchant banker Malcolm Turnbull, who won leadership of the Liberal Party, chaired the Australian Republican Movement ahead of a failed 1999 referendum on the plan. Congratulating Turnbull on his victory, Rudd -- who describes himself as "a life-long republican" -- said he looked forward to "working with him on a timetable" for introducing a republic.

GOOD NEWS! The benefit to rescue La Mama Theatre that I performed at last Monday night generated around $35,000. We’ve just heard that La Mama has now secured all of its funding to purchase the building and will go on In PeurpleTutu. Thanks to all who performed and attended!

Health Tip of the Week Home Remedy for Tooth Ache
Do you have a recently discovered cavity in one of your teeth? Is the dentine around the tooth sensitive making it hard to bite down or chew? Try this. I had a dentist appointment penciled in my diary for Monday and I did this on Sunday night before I went to bed. When I woke up Monday morning, I had no dentine irritation so I cancelled the dentist appointment. I still haven’t rescheduled it. This seems to be working. Take a small amount of home-made colloidal silver solution and brush it into the cavity. The silver particles should kill the bacteria that are nastifying your tooth. Then to desensitize the dentine, crush up some cloves as fine as you can get them in a mortal and pestle and mix the fine powder with a small amount of oil (flax, olive, whatever). Let it saturate for awhile and then dab this around the dentine of the tooth with a cotton bud.  You can also gargle and/or drink a half teas of Baking Soda (sodium bicarbonate) mixed in a little water with some lemon juice for a good alkaline hit. See here for more information on the acidic nature of tooth decay:

Warning: This information is not intended to replace the advice of a doctor.


im stuck......trying to write a version of stones in my passway, you see  i suffer from chronic kidney stones.
no bush shit, al johnson

(Note: It’s an honour to receive a letter from Robert Johnson’s brother, Al.  Al, mate, looks like you need a little Rolling Stones (boom boom!), or try listening to Hendrix’s  ‘Stone Free,’ (boom boom!). Earth Wind and Fire sang that ‘ . . . love is in the stone . .’ (boom boom!). Then there’s the Stone Roses, Queens of the Stone Age, Stone Temple Pilots,  Stone Poneys, Stone Sour, Stone Breath,  Stone (Finnish thrash metal band) and The Stone (Serbian black metal band), Angie Stone, Eric Stone and Joss Stone, and of course, my old band with Jonathan Edwards, and Malcolm and Todd McKinney, back in the 70s, The Headstone Circus. Although in your case, a more appropriate name might be The Kidneystone Circus.)

haha  joe!!!!
krisna is blue!  now i get it!!  thank you for including the beautiful picture too.  and the emerson quotation.  for anyone who wants to truly and deeply appreciate art or to create art ( and almost anything mindfully created can be art), there could be no concept more crucial and more moving.  i can remember from even when i was quite small being astounded at how art which moved me contained in a most deep and focussed way things which had just flitted across my mind as passing thoughts.  learning to trust and capture them is the whole trick, isn't it?  i remember a line from a leonard cohen novel in which he was describing things which he wanted to tell people, but hadn't told them.  what he wrote was "My mind broke out into postcards."  i just couldn't believe it, because i do the exact same thing in my mind!  i'll bet lots of people do.  and i thought to myself "how the hell does he know that?  it's like magic!!"    the great artists seem to have such a high and confident ability to do this consistently, and what they give us is there for us to learn from.  what a ray of hope this can be in a world which can feel so dark sometimes...
and speaking of consistency, for some reason, every time your newsletter arrives, the topics in it relate to something which is happening just as it arrives--for example...
i was having the exact same discussion about cancer with a friend literally minutes before your newsletter arrived.   he told me that he'd been having the same discussion with another friend of ours yesterday, and when he expressed ideas pretty much just like yours to her, she walked out on him.
the only time i ever minded the idea of my own death was when my son was a kid, because i was a single parent.  so i made a bargain with god.  i said, "just let me live long enough to know that my boy can stand on his own two feet.  after that, i'll consider the rest gravy." (if i'm extra lucky, i'll get to die before he does--that would be bonus maximus!!)  my request was generously granted!  i've had a good time, and i don't mind dying, but i sure miss my family and friends when they do it, which a lot have.  life is scary sometimes.  death is scary for people, and cancer absolutely terrifies everyone.  i hope things go well with you and your family as you deal with your child's cancer. here are the lyrics to a song i wrote about all that,  called "short time here"

everybody complains     when they don't get what they wanted
when they get what they want   they take it all for granted
take a look at your blessings    count them one by one
we're a short time here--- long time gone

everybody has something    they're putting off until tomorrow
but the only time we have   is the little time we borrow
and it hurts to be haunted    by the things you wish you'd done
we're a short time here--- long time gone

everybody has a vow   that they wish they hadn't broken
or a careless word   that they wish they hadn't spoken
and the marks of our passing   good or bad will carry on
they're a long time here  when we're a long time gone

hope for joyful souls   hope for beauty to surround us
hope for peaceful worlds   hope that finally has found us
coming out of the darkness  to the light of the sun
we're a short time here---long time gone

love always, Joan Besen
Ps. a raccoon just ripped the crap out of my backdoor screen and walked right into my house.  they are being particularly destructive this year.  i just told that same friend who got walked out on about it, and his response was "i hate the rain.  i'm going to kill it.  and the birds are jerks too!"

(Note: Joan, Thanks for the wonderful correspondence as usual!  I can understand why the person walked out when presented with the left-wing health ideas. One’s personal healing decisions are akin to a religious belief system. Mainly because there are so many out there and a lot of the good ones even conflict or contradict each other! So when someone gets something they can commit to, they really hate hearing about something different. It can confuse them.  I remember once I was talking to a friend who had a guru-  about another guru that I had heard about. He interrupted me mid-sentence and said, ‘I’ve found my guru – I don’t really need to know about any others.’  To me that is just plain stupid thinking but what can you do? The greatest gurus assimilate ALL teachers in their path.  Just look at Rajneesh, Gurdieff (Meetings with Remarkable Men), Yogadananda (Autobiography of a Yogi) or Gandhi. They embraced it all.  A wise friend once said: never tell an Indian that you don’t believe in gurus – tell them that you are still looking!)

Joe Dolce,
it's bad enough having the dubya-loving corporate media drive me insane with their 24/7 obamania, but i don't need it from you as well. pity.  have enjoyed your newsletters in the past. M.

 M, of the 6760 words included in my last newsletter, 244 focused on Obama, which is 3%. Hardly enough to warrant the term, mania .  However, I plan to up that percentage in the weeks to come! I subscribe to the principle of ‘Know Where you Stand . . . And Stand there!’  Also, there is a bit of a mixed message in your note.  You say the dubya-lovin’ corporate media are driving you crazy with 24/7 obamania (which I assume is negative press) yet I am obviously pro-Obama, so one would think that would be refreshingly welcome.  Where exactly do YOU stand, mate? Hard to tell if you are Arthur or Martha. However, I will remove your address from the newsletter as you request. One less digital stamp to lick.)

pure genius of a correspondence with Lubov! I last heard that she was hitching up her skirts and dangling her sleighbells, preparing to depart her dacha to head across the snowy climes of Siberia to check you out: she reckons her chest hair and woolly armpits are merino quality compared with your wife's moustache. And thank you for being so indulgently straight and leveling with Wendy. Have a wonderful week! Salmanus

Citizen Salmanus, first cousin of the catamite Commodius,here’s a picture of Lubov that she sent me recently.  She has certain attributes as you can see and I would be glad to introduce you. As Senator Porkus Pigai one remarked, ‘ Abeo, abeo, abeo, actum est, comites!  Ah-bee, ah-bee, ah-bee, that's all, folks!)

Good Morning Joe,
From the time I was an aspiring teen drummer, Harvey Mason has been one of my favorite and most respected players. His skills as not only a masterful drummer and percussionist but composer, arranger and champion of all musical styles fell right in line with what I considered to be a truly well-rounded musician.
Now I have a new reason to call Harvey a hero. It's a song he produced and co-composed in support of Presidential candidate Barack Obama titled "A Change We Can Believe In (Yes We Can)." Harvey co-composed the song with his old friend Jerry Peters (another amazing all around music master) and the incomparable singer/songwriter/superstar Deniece Williams. The triumverate is hoping that - at some point between now and November - their song will be officially adopted by Mr. Obama and the Democratic Party as the theme song of his historical campaign. Please check out the video for "A Change We Can Believe In (Yes We Can)" - sung by a choir of superstars and everyday people alike in Hollywood's legendary Capitol Records Studio A - at the YouTube link below...and pass it on!
Musically Yours, A. Scott Galloway

Here’s another interesting Barack Obama song sent to me by Maireid Sullivan, Takin' it Back with Barack, Jack! (For Swing voters!!!):

Joe (and all),
Oh my, as a Canadian friend would say, but aren’t we living in interesting times? From floods in Yorkshire to storms the size of Texas (well done the Bush for sorting out the relief funding pronto this time – oh I forgot, he comes from there), even while the Aussies are being roasted by the greatest drought in living memory (or was it the Olympics? – hush my mouth!).  And we hardly had time to digest the credit crunch (it’s a cereal, I am convinced) when Lehman Brothers go bankrupt (who’d have though it), 90,000 holidaymakers are stranded abroad by the failure of XL, and Labour MPs are fighting each other for a place in the queue to stab Gordon Brown in the back.  And just when you think you’ve seen it all, they start up the Large Hadron Collider.  And I bet no-one thought to ask the large hadrons if they wanted to be smashed into each other! Particle-ism I call it, pure and simple. . .
 . . . And I am less of a man these days.  11kg less, to be precise (WHAT did you think I meant?), and losing slowly. I will never be size zero, but if I can get down to 100kg from my starting point of 142 I’ll be a happy boy. What am I saying – even 110 will be great.  I have already gained a whole new wardrobe of clothes that I kept for years “just in case I lose weight”… George Papavgeris
(Note: George,  I have a drawer filled with clothes that are too tight as well – as probably quite a few other readers do. But the last few months I have been dipping into it!  Here's a weight loss tip that has been working for me. We make our main sit-down meal  LUNCH and just have tea and toast for breakfast and dinner. That's it basically. By eating the main meal in the middle of the day, we have the rest of the day to metabolise it with activity  - rather than packing it in it at night and then flopping on the couch to watch movies or other sedentary things. I lost 7 kgs the first month I did this. I am now at my target weight and maintaining it.  But, I'd also like to know more about that Hardon Collider. Is that something like Viagra, or a person?)

Dear Mr Joe Dolce,
I'm not sure how I got on your mailing list in the first place (I think we met once at Judy Small's CD launch but I don't recall the exchange of business cards or bodily fluids)...  anyway, usually my first response to unsolicitored newsletters and the like unexpectedly popping up in my 'in box' , invokes the screaming banshee in me - my immediate, impulsive reaction is to seek out the 'unsubscribe' button (often missing, but which your newsletter has politely and correctly included) and say FAK OFF - I HATE SPAM!!! However, I have to tell you, that after receiving your newsletter for 7 consecutive weeks (who's counting?), and despite the fact that I am horrendously busy, time-poor and in an almost constant hormonally-charged-high-irritation-factor-state-of-being (my doctor refers to this as being 40+ peri-menopausal, or in my twilight menstrual years) I admit:
1. I actually read it (well, not always all of it)
2. I usually find something of interest in it (last week's recipe was novel)
3. Strangely, I now look forward to it
Really, and I haven't even got time to finish my morning latte. Anyway, just wanted to tell you that. . .
 . . . I can't believe I found time to write you all that (and be so neat) - on a frantic Friday!... see what you've done!
Gotta go - cheers for now,  Elly Mantzaris,
Creative Director, Black Widow Graphic Design

(Note: Elly, your email warmed my heart. I love being looked forward to! Seven weeks on the list isn’t bad. Imagine getting it weekly for five years! That’s how long some readers have been gluttons for punishment. I think Judy Small is one of those longtime sufferers. Better make her a latte while you’re at it.)

Local Gay and Lesbian Italiano Action
Amici, Goombahs, Zii, Nonni ed Amanti!!

invites you to join us in a game (or two) of bocce
followed by scrumptious food, and extras…
Saturday 8th November, 2008
Veneto Club
191 Bulleen Rd, Bulleen
3.40pm SHARP for 4pm START
Info/RSVPs: Frances 0412 868 438 or

Lea DeLaria

Lea DeLaria is coming to Melb for two shows -13 & 14 November. Sydney & Adelaide sisters will also have the opportunity of seeing Lea perform.
As an italian-american dyke comedian - Lea's show is one not to be missed.
 Lea famously said 'I have nothing against penises. I just don't like them on men.'
For more info on Lea:
si, la vita e bella!!!
"Talks like a coffee grinder, and sounds like a cross between Ella Fitzgerald and a Broadway diva."
The Guardian

What I’m Reading This Week
by John Varley.   In your face sci-fi, including a race of alien Centaurs with three different sex organs. I want a set. Tom Clancy considers Varley the best writer in America.

What I’m Watching This Week
with Jean Reno. Produced by Luc Besson. French cop in Tokyo meets the Yakuza. Reno is always a joy and this is a semi-comic role that Bruce Willis could just as easily have played.

What I’m Listening to This Week
Helen Razor Attempting to Interview Steven Berkoff on ABC radio. Amazingly painful. It makes you not want to listen to the ABC or go see Berkoff. A classic study in how not to approach an interview.
(thanks to Leo Dale)

Tennessee Williams, Alive and Living in George W Bush Country!
(Reporting by Tim Gaynor; writing by Mary Milliken; Editing by Chris Wilson)

GALVESTON, Texas (Reuters) - As Galveston told its remaining residents on Monday to leave the Texas island devastated by Hurricane Ike,
Robert's Lafitte, a gay bar, was planning a pre-curfew drag show and Tina Turner sing-along.
The first of two bars to reopen after Ike's onslaught on Saturday, Robert's Lafitte is a haven in the storm -- for gays, straights, anyone who needs a place to drink and find comfort.
"You can see there's not too much worry and stress on people's faces," said Dixie Monroe, a transgender barmaid who wore a tiger-print cowboy hat and a low-cut top.
Outside, Black Hawk helicopters clattered overhead and emergency teams searched for people stranded in the flooded city of 60,000 people. Up the street lay a huge field of splintered wood.
Big Mouth Robert, the establishment's owner and a former female impersonator, said the bar took 3 feet (1 meter) of water and closed when Ike's fury blew out the windows. But after a mop-up the next morning, Robert's Lafitte was back in business.
"All of our customers kind of demanded it," said Robert. "It's their bar and they kind of dictate what's going on. We're survivors."
Tina Turner is the artist of choice at the bar, given that she survived another Ike -- her abusive husband Ike Turner. The bar is setting out food donated by locals for people in need. Some 20,000 people are thought to be still on the island and food and water are scarce.
"It's more than a life saver. This is like the Coast Guard," said Brian DeLeon, a straight restaurant worker who had not visited the bar before. These are the people who take you up out of the water and make life livable. Once I get back to work, I'm coming back here."
(thanks to Bill Lempke)

Don Corleone Speaks Out on John Edwards
(thanks to Kathy Gentiluomo)

Here’s a great little site. You type in your last name and the map shows you where the highest concentration of people with the same last name are located.
My highest concentrations are in Italy, Argentina, and The USA. It also breaks it down even further to States. Go find your long long relatives! Collect that money they owe you.
(thanks to Tom Howlett)

Saudi Law Allows Murder for 'Immoral' TV
Saudi Arabia 's top judiciary official has issued a religious decree saying it is permissible to kill the owners of satellite TV networks that broadcast immoral content.
The 79-year-old Sheik Saleh al-Lihedan said on Friday that satellite channels cause the "deviance of thousands of people".
Many of the most popular Arab satellite networks - which include channels showing music videos often denounced as obscene by Muslim conservatives - are owned by Saudi princes and well-connected Saudi businessmen.

You are The Boss... which team would you hire?

With America facing historic debt, multiple war fronts, sky-rocketing health care costs, a weakened dollar, an all-time high prison population, skyrocketing Federal spending, mortgage crises, bank foreclosures, etc. etc., this is an unusually critical election year. Let's look at the educational background of your two options:

Barack Obama:
-Occidental College - Two years.
-Columbia University - B.A. political science with a specialization in international relations.
-Harvard - Juris Doctor (J.D.) Magna Cum Laude

Joe Biden:
-University of Delaware - B.A. in history and B.A. in political science.
-Syracuse University College of Law - Juris Doctor (J.D.)


John McCain:
-United States Naval Academy - Class rank 894 of 899

Sarah Palin:
-Hawaii Pacific University - 1 semester
-North Idaho College - 2 semesters - general study
-University of Idaho - 2 semesters - journalism
-Matanuska-Susitna College - 1 semester
-University of Idaho - 3 semesters - B.A. in journalism

Now, which team are you going to hire ?
(thanks to Bill Lempke)

Book of Bunny Suicides
A spate of suicides and attempted suicides by children in China's biggest city has prompted a bookseller to pull a popular cartoon book featuring suicidal bunnies off its shelves. The decision by Bookuu Book City in Shanghai to take the Chinese-language version of "Book of Bunny Suicides: Little Fluffy Rabbits Who Just Don't Want to Live Anymore" off the shelves reflects unease and soul-searching over pressures on Chinese students.
The book is a sometimes morbid but humorous collection of cartoons showing a rabbit attempting to end his life in various bizarre ways.
"We took the book off our shelves because we're worried that children might try to imitate some of those ways of killing themselves," said Zhu Bin, a public relations officer for the bookseller.
In just over a week after the school term began on September 1, one boy killed himself and another four teens attempted to commit suicide, prompting a flurry of commentary in Shanghai's state-run newspapers blaming the exams pressure on students.


John Cleese’s Funny Funeral Speech for Graham Chapman

Weird Innuendo !!! This was a children’s TV Show!

Vietnam Idol

Whose Line is It Anyway? (Wayne sings to female bodybuilder.)

Whose Line is It Anyway? (Richard Simmons does the Props!)

Let's Use Wind to Power Cars
by Lester R. Brown

Legendary Texas oilman T. Boone Pickens is half right. We do need to harness this country's wind resources for a homegrown source of electricity, as he has been urging this summer in expensive television ads. And we do need to reduce the $700 billion we may soon be paying annually for imported oil.
But part two of Pickens's plan -- to move natural gas out of electricity production and use it to fuel cars instead -- just doesn't make sense.
Why not use the wind-generated electricity to power cars directly? Natural gas is still a fossil fuel that emits climate-changing gases when burned.
Plug-in cars are here, nearly ready to market. We just need to put wind in the driver's seat. Several major auto manufacturers, including GM, Ford, Toyota and Nissan, are producing plug-in hybrids. Both Toyota and GM are committed to marketing plug-in hybrids in 2010. Toyota might even try to deliver a plug-in version of its Prius gas-electric hybrid, the bestseller whose U.S. sales match those of all other hybrids combined, next year.

T. Boone Pickens Plan
T. Boone Pickens Facebook

German Factory to Make Electronic Paper

A low-cost electronic display made of plastic that could replace books, magazines and newspapers has gone into production in Germany.
British-registered company Plastic Logic said on Wednesday it would make more than one million of the "electronic paper" displays annually at the plant in Dresden.
They are about the size of a large exercise book and weigh less than 500 grams.
The device comprises transistor arrays on a flexible plastic surface, unlike silicon-based systems in current e-books and digital photo frames.
It has been dubbed electronic paper, though it cannot be folded or rolled up.
The company's chief executive, Richard Archuleta, said it was both bigger and thinner than competing products.
It caused a sensation when made public last week at the DemoFall trade show in San Diego, California.
Archuleta said the device's name and price would be disclosed early next year when it went on sale.
Potential uses include reading magazines, newspapers and books.
Files can be loaded into the device with a thumbstick or can be transmitted to it by Bluetooth wireless signals.
Archuleta said schoolchildren could load electronic textbooks onto the display and would no longer have to carry bags of heavy books to and from school. The screen measures 216 by 279 millimetres.
"It saves paper, ink and transport costs," he said.
The company predicted world demand for the devices at more than 42 million by 2010.
Some news publishers have said it could ultimately replace periodicals published on paper.
The eastern city of Dresden was chosen as the manufacturing site because of government aid there to electronics projects.
Construction of the plant began in May 2007.



Joe Dolce teaches how to do wrestling moves.

(Note: Hey! Why not? Little known fact:  Charles John Spencer, better known by his professional ring name of Tony Mamaluke, uses 'Shaddap You Face' as his entrance music! Tony Mamaluke is best known for his work on Extreme Championship Wrestling and  World Wrestling Entertainment. Some of his most famous moves are the Sicilian Stretch (Grounded inverted facelock submission),  the Sicilian Necktie (Cross armbreaker),  the Italian Sleeper (Guillotine choke),  the Italian Suplex (High-angle belly to back waist lock suplex),  the Sicilian Crab (Over the shoulder single leg Boston crab),  the Sicilian Slice (Inverted double underhook facebuster) and the Spaghetti Bender (Grounded octopus stretch). I could teach him the Baccala Prostatic Thumb Jab.  Speaking of baccala, see Dr AA Baccala’s papers: Induction of Immunity to Prostate Cancer Antigens:, AA – and a thematic prostate healthy recipe:)


Baccala’ a la Sergio
(Sergio’s codfish)

1.5 lb (600g) salted codfish, cut into portions
3⁄4 cup (200g) onions, fine diced
4 anchovies
1 clove of garlic
2 tbsp (30ml) fresh parsley, chopped
1 cup (230ml) milk
1⁄2 cup (115ml) white wine
2 tbsp (30ml) all-purpose flour
2 tbsp (30ml) fresh grated Parmesan
1⁄4 cup (60ml) olive oil
2 tbsp (30ml) tomato paste
Salt and pepper to taste
Warm water if needed

1/ Soak dry codfish in fresh water (to be changed as needed until it is soft) for 3–4 days before using it.
2/ Dust codfish with flour and set aside.
3/ Heat the olive oil and sauté onions until translucent.
4/ Add anchovies and garlic.
5/ Place the codfish in the pan and sear all pieces on both sides.
6/ Add wine and let evaporate.
7/ Add milk, Parmesan, the tomato paste and let cook over low heat for at least one hour (add water in case the liquid isn’t enough).
8/ Check the softness of the cod and cook longer in case the fish isn’t soft enough, in this case add more water. Add parsley towards the end.
9/ Serve immediately with polenta.

Substitute salted codfish with fresh codfish or only add salt to the fish at end of cooking, if needed; use sea salt.
Instead of using white flour, dust fish with whole wheat flour to increase fibre.
Use a non-stick pan so less olive oil is needed.
Before soaking the fish, get someone to give you a good hard arse-whallopin’ with one of them large dried board-stiff baccalas. That should improve your circulation.

Newsletter Archive  and  Recipe Index

NEWS!  Joe Dolce new CD, 'The Wind Cries Mary,' chosen as ALBUM OF THE YEAR by 97.1 FM, 3MDR Radio, Melbourne!

'The modern Baptist Church served as an appropriately sophisticated setting for Joe Dolce's, Joan on Fire, an oratorio for string orchestra and choir. Yes, it is the same Joe Dolce who sang 'Shaddap You Face' - but this was a far cry from the pop song that made his name. Inspired by a lucid dream concerning the last moments of Joan of Arc, the oratorio consisted of a series of poems set to music and performed by Chorelation and the Melbourne Chamber Orchestra. The music - inspired by composers as diverse as Philip Glass and J.S. Bach - was an effective blend of lush Romanticism and Minimalist splendor.  The Herald-Sun

“ The greatest musician who ever lived. He can make the animals dance!”  Osvaldo Paese

Listen to audio excerpts:
Joe Dolce Electronic Press Kit


How much is that Barbie in the Window?

One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday.
He pulls over to a Toy Shop, goes inside and asks the sales person, 'How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?'
The sales person answers, 'Which one do you mean, Sir? We have: Work Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for $19.95, Ballerina Barbie for $19.95, Astronaut Barbie for $19.95, Skater Barbie for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.95'.
The amazed father asks: 'It 's what?! Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?'
The annoyed sales person rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers:  
'Sir ..., Divorced Barbie comes with: Ken's Car, Ken's House, Ken's Boat, Ken's Furniture, Ken's Computer and one of Ken's Friends.
(thanks to Jim Testa)