Some of Me Mates

Paul, the Texan Emu Rancher - Now this dude jes has ter be crazy!! Why would anyone in their right mind ever wanna farm bleedin emus?? I asks ya! We gort the bleedin things runnin rampagious riots over here, chargin all over the place, smashin down fences, attackin innercent lil ole leddies in the street, terrifyin toddlers and so on. We gort millions of the buggers! Cripes, I could have sent him a whole mob of em iffen he had asked! Well..go check his page out fer yerselfs!

Paul's Emu Farm

Max (not the Mad one..another mad one) This dude has his own city, called Max City, even though his surname is really Pearson, wot makes him one of me rellies I spects..I dunno..there allus was a few odd ones in our family. I dunno wot ter say about Max...I think yer better go see fer yerselfs!

Not-Mad Max's Hangout

Me mate, YB is the coolest filly in Houston. She owns a classy tangerine-red car called "The Dream" Besides bein the coolest person in Houston and prolly the world, YB is a very special person:)

Direct link to theRock 'n Roll Heaven

Cuz Larry is famous fer havin' writ the most beautiful pome inna whole world. Unfortunately, he lost it. I spect his missus used it to stoke the boiler. He does other things too, wot would make him famous too, but I ain't allowed to discuss them things. Now folks...yer better wotch out iffen yer pays me cuz a visit. His missus does strange things in the basement wiv their boiler.And they mightn't let him out to talks to youse..depends on whether Nurse Ratched has given him his medication.

Direct link to theHome fer the Criminally-Insane

 Porl the Dunny Cleaner who is ter be found scrubbin the leddies' dunnies at Heathrow Airport..wot is in Lunnon. He has a lot of mates down his local boozer such as Bert and the barmaid. He can't speak English too good cuz he is one of them fellas wot wears a towel wrapped round his head and one of them long dresses.
Porl's Dunny

Me Mate Gem, who lives in some weird place called Galveston Island. The heat down there musta turned her brain cuz she is really a "he" called BS Pyle. Yer can find lots of his rantins at this addy...

 BS Pyle's hangout down south where they all speaks Spanish

Ole Bill is one of them English Lechers..well that might be a bit confusin seein how he lives in Amerca and they doan speak English there.Ole Bill can't spell and he doan know much about grammar or litrachure either, but I is teachin him all them things soze he can teach his students. He does seem to know a lot about rhetoric, wot I doan know nuffink much about. All I does know is that iffen youse asks Ole Bill a simple yes/no question, he answers in about 10 pages of close typewritten text..which, iffen yer manages to wade through it all, you ain't much better orf afore you asked him the question. So..jes doan ask him to explain anything simple and youse will be OK. Iffen he does get the urge to explain summat to yers, jes nods yer head and looks intelligent:) PS ..Ole Bill has a fish fetish wot I will explain more about, later..Shhhhhhh! Bugger it...soze he has gorn ter DC..wot is even weirder than Slippery Rock!! Wait fer me expose on it...comin soon!!

Ole Bill's Slippery hangout on top of a mountain of steel slag

Rqy Cripes! Wot can I say about Rqy?? Well his name really ain't Rqy, it's Xiao, wot is Chinese fer red-topped bald monkey. In fact Rqy really is a monkey, but he pretends he is human. Doan get me wrong folks, Rqy is a real cool lookin dude and iffen I was a monkey and not a wolfess, I would be hot footing it over to Rqy's. Rqy lives onna island wiv millions of other monkeys and humans. The humans doan speak English either. Rqy lives wiv a beautiful princess who ain't twigged to the fact that Rqy is really a monkey, either. Rqy is busy doing the monkeys with the typewriter thingy and creating alla World's litrachure.

This will get yer to Rqy's and his mate Ken.

Carlos Wanna go to Rio.. that's Janeiro?..Want some genuine Brazilian couth and culture? Wanna look at some real classy art work? Well hop over and meet me mate Carlos. He will try and kid yers that he "no speaka da lingo", but don't get fooled . Carlos speaks the English lingo real well. His fetish is lurkin'. I woan say nuffink about this neither, cept to tell yers that he is allus watchin'!

Carlos' Peephole somewhere in Brazil

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Me best mate Kevin Bloody Wilson. He will tells yer alla about life inna Australia . You knows, how the upper classes live. Once you have listened to wot he has to say, youse will be all ok to visit ole Queenie and Charlie Big Ears in Buckingham Palace.Go and drop in tell him I sent yers

The Famous Tink, who thot he could escape me prehensile claws!!Doan expect to get a decent pic of him, but!!

Yer never gonna believe this fella!! Cripes! look wot he has his arms around and he is bleedin lookin atta camera!! Spose he can't help it, he makes nuclear missiles in England..someone ortta tell England that the rest of the world stopped makin em a long time ago..silly buggers..oh yeah, you is wunnering who he is..I jes calls him
Mad Mikey!! He is working onna project to work out how to fuse his bum to his office chair:)) This bloke is bleedin crazy!!

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