In 1986 the Australian Council of Churches Commission on the Status of Women presented at the biennial meeting, an audiovisual on domestic violence titled "Breaking the Silence". The video was researched and prepared by an ecumenical group of women based in Sydney, who had become increasingly aware of the voices of other women telling stories of their life experiences of domestic violence. Physical, psychological and spiritual violence perpetrated against them by their partners. This major social problem was taken up by both the Federal and State governments in Australia under the National Domestic Violence Advisory Council. I represented the Council of Churches as a member of the Domestic Violence Advisory Council for Western Australia which was directly responsible to the Premier. Domestic violence is an issue of great concern to women, and indeed to concerned men, who now work in various service provision areas to assist women and their families who are the victims of domestic violence. For too long, the inequality of relationships, whether through custom, tradition or ignorance, has allowed this violence to be contained within the home as the "private sphere" and of no business of neighbours or friends.

The Church (it was reported by many women during the research for the video) thought to be a sanctuary for women, only sanctioned the sacrament of the marriage, when women pleaded for help - the priest or minister rarely offered any help or advice other than for the woman to return home. The major churches in Australia, are now increasingly involved in programmes to raise the consciousness of their clergy and laity about this issue. Regretfully,for too long it has been an issue rarely spoken about in our Orthodox communities or indeed or many other "ethnic " communities, where it would seem to the majority culture, ie Australia, that "ethnic" women have few rights within their marriage, and the occurrences of violence only come to notice, when women are admitted to hospital or indeed an even greater tragedy occurs.

The following paper was presented at a public forum in my capacity as a member of the ACC Commission on the Status of Women.

Flawed Theology and Domestic Violence The Church - Sanctuary or Prison?

"there is a silence about domestic violence - even in the Church". These were the opening words of the audio-visual prepared by the ACC Commission on the Status of Women in July 1986.The presentation of this video was greeted with shocked silence by a predominantly male and clergy audience. Their reception to the video was mixed, as were the questions that followed. For many questions displayed a disturbing lack of understanding or even compassion and indeed a criticism was made that the content was too biased towards women, too factual and too serious.

However, it was a beginning to a slow process of consciousness raising of women, men, and clergy in the Church on the issue of domestic violence. The script reminded us that violence "is not only physical, but is any act that violates the body, the mind, the personality, the soul".

These 'violences' have been perpetrated over centuries in the dogma and theology of the Church, through its teachings, selective biblical exegesis and the denial of the wholeness of woman in the life of the Church. The writings of the early church fathers concerning women are often in direct contrast to the teachings of Christ and his positive affirming relationship with women of the gospels. There are writings of the Fathers and in Canon Law that positively discriminate against and also demean women. These writings are oft quoted and still influence the attitude towards women at this time at the end of the twentieth century.

St Gregory stated: "Woman is slow in understanding and her unstable and naive mind renders her by way of natural weakness to the necessity of a strong hand in her husband. Her use is twofold ­ animal sex and motherhood".

St Cyril of Alexandria is noted for his statement - "For the most capable of commanding is the male always, . and in second class the female everywhere".

And so on. For millenia women have lived with the image of a predestined enslavement to her husband, her salvation through penance and suffering, even childbirth was perceived as a condemnation from God because she was a woman. These perceptions have assumed the force of "immutable eternal law, a permanent ruler-subject relationship between man and woman". This relationship is defined and carefully nurtured by the Church not according to the gifts of woman or man but merely on account of their gender. Women of the Church are encouraged to adopt a religious piety of devotion and sacrifice which keeps women in intolerable submission. The Church blesses the marriage as a sacrament, and deems it an intimate and private affair to be lived out behind closed doors. For many women, marriage as the promised paradise- with the ideal family- has become the reality of a private hell.

Statistics in Australia tell us that domestic violence occurs in three out of ten households, households most often blessed by the Church. The research of the domestic violence task group led to a disturbing conclusion that "women in the church are just as likely to experience domestic violence as women in the wider community". And it is this information that shocked the delegates so much at the general meeting. And yet, why should the Church and the clergy be so shocked? It is in the Church that patriarchal authority is paramount, where the masculine is the power and where the feminine is submissive.

From early life, woman is reminded of her lesser status in the hierarchy of her religion. In some traditions of some churches not for her a full welcome and blessing of the Church even at forty days old, not for her the eucharist when she is considered to be unclean, not for her the joyous entry into church after childbirth, and not for her the equal partnership in marriage. Even the women saints in the tradition of the church are burdened as Eve's daughters. The hymns of praise to such women contain phrases that have come down to us over the centuries, for example, "she is praiseworthy for her strengthening of female rottenness" . It can be truly stated, I believe, that for women there is a deep conviction that "our inherited sin from the first Eve continues to outweigh the virtues and blessings of the second Eve".

The different interpretations of the creation story of the Old Testament have permitted and indeed encouraged the cultural and social parameters of superiority to be deferred to man whilst teaching woman to accept her inferiority to man and be subject to them in all matters. This flawed and narrow theology so enthusiastically expounded from the pulpit in many churches of today is also reinforced in some preparation and advice manual given to couples embarking upon marriage. In the late 1970s a marriage advice manual of an Orthodox church in USA contained advice that one can only hope does not exist today.

" Every successful marriage needs a leader, That leader according to God's word, is the husband. The husband needs to be the leader, the aggressor. He represents the authority of the family. He provides the necessary leadership He executes the proper discipline most women long for a dominant man".

Hardly reassuring words for a young woman embarking on a lifetime partnership. Very powerful words of 'permission' for a man. This "timely and helpful" advice is further emphasised in the marriage service -

Grant unto this woman to be in all things subject to the man, and to this Your servant to be at the head of the woman.

In many cultures and traditions the words of the marriage ceremony, a sacrament of the church, continue to perpetuate the message of woman's secondary place to man, and the authoritarian role for the man.

The many questions put before the member churches of the Australian Council of Churches by the Commission on the Status of Women were not only about the direct incidence of domestic violence in the home, and more especially in a church home. They also raised the issues concerning the structures of power and authority in Church and State by which women were excluded from the beginning through custom, culture and attitude. Domestic Violence is an expression of behaviour which emanates from that given power that men may wield over women, in a society where female dependence on the male is built into the structures of everyday life. The Commission's findings showed that while many women turned initially to their priest or minister for help, over two thirds were found to be unhelpful, and advised the women to either forgive their husband and return home, or else offered no advice at all, leaving the woman to suffer in isolation, accepting their suffering as their "cross to bear".

The task group report enabled the Commission women to understand some of the suffering of their sisters who lived in isolation in their private prison. A place, not of love and friendship and laughter, but of personal deprivation, punishment, confinement, obedience and criminal assault. Not for the domestic violence victim is the home or church a sanctuary against violence. The home was a sanctuary for the man, a private place protecting him against arrest for assault, the church, also a sanctuary, a place which did not condemn but in fact protected the man against public condemnation.

Domestic violence is not a new aberration of modem society brought about by the stresses of our progressive technological changes. These stresses help create the conditions for alcohol abuse for example but stress brought on by that abuse or financial considerations or unemployment, creating an inability to cope, cannot be nor are the reasons or excuses for domestic violence. There has been a silence from the Church on domestic violence against women over the centuries - for woman has always been a possession to treat at will. Domestic violence is a violation of trust and the understanding of sacrament between two people and reflects in part the tradition of patriarchy and submission of women long held by the Church.

The women of today in the Church say no longer - the silence must cease. The women are now raising their voices and they challenge the Church to act. The women say it is not enough any longer for the Church to speak out in isolation on the issues of social concern such as the breakdown of family life, homeless kids, incest, divorce, etc.. The perception of many women is that somehow there is a suggestion that a woman, the wife or the mother, is responsible or to blame for the failure of society's expectations.

Domestic violence is not unique to white middle class anglo-saxon Australian homes. It exists across all socio-economic, cultural, racial and religious differences. It is not unique to Australia, it is a world wide phenomena. As the Ecumenical Commission on the Status of Women has raised this issue to consciousness in the member churches in Australia, so women's voices are raised against violence in other countries. Wherever the culture and customs of religion place man in authority , there lies the possibility of domestic violence. Even in our own society, there are many migrant women, unable to communicate effectively in English who are often trapped by their culture, isolated in their family structure, afraid to speak out because of shame for themselves and perceived dishonour to the family.

Change is always difficult. But many women are prepared to nurture the process, to share their stories, to educate their parishes and their clergy, to be involved in providing refuges for those women who had finally said "no more". Whilst acknowledging that some member churches have reluctantly provided limited financial support for some women's refuges, at a more local and personal level, domestic violence is still not an issue high on the priority pastoral care list for parishes or clergy.

When the Church hears statistics that domestic violence occurs in 3 out of 10 homes in Australia, (many of which are 'church' homes), that available refuges are filled with battered women and children, and that in one state alone over 23,000 women in one year were turned away without help for there was no room or further financial support., then surely the Church must ask "where do they go?", "who else do they turn to?", "did they have to return home to 'prison'?" Whilst in recent times, domestic violence has come onto the agenda of working parties of social justice commissions of some member churches, and indeed recommendations have been presented to synods and assemblies, this is not sufficient.

What is needed in all our churches, is not only the bandaid, but a change of attitude and theological exegesis as to who the woman really is in the understanding of being "in God's image". For the churches need to reflect deeply on the messages it has "spoken" to women and men over many centuries. No, the Church, does not and never has advocated any form of violence against women, but the interpretation of many aspects of the doctrines of the faith have led to an understanding and permission to enact behaviour that has no place in the Christian church or any society founded on Christian ethics and teaching.

A woman is not the 'old Eve', the Church's eternal sinner, she is not the Mother of God, the virgin beyond sin. Woman is a beautiful human being, created in the image of God, capable of all the range of human ability, frailty, behaviour and emotion. She is not alone the cause and blame for the breakdown in human relationships, she is not responsible for the uncontrolled or calculated violence perpetrated against her. She is the victim, the one who suffers and often suffers silently because of the expectations of her protected family image, and to retain some semblance of home life for her children. The Church must surely recognize this injustice. The Church surely will take a responsibility to redress this situation. The Church surely will look to its role in its flawed theology that places women in such a vulnerable position. The Church must be the sanctuary it was meant to be.

References :

Script, ACC Commission on Status of Women, "Breaking the Silence" 1986
Joan Chittister, "Women, Ministry and the Church", 1983
Eva C Topping, "Holy Mothers of Orthodoxy", 1987
Orthodox Marriage Advice Manual, Greek Orthodox Archdiocese, 1971, USA
WCC Ecumenical Decade Resource Book, 1988