Given the legendary amnesia of the Australian public there is a crying need for memorial to Mr John Howard and his remarkable conduct of them over the last two months. Something inescapable and permanent is required with an unavoidable presence, so that Australians may take pride in the way they voted and in his ultimate victory.

Only a work of art can do this, huge, permanent, cast in bronze, carved in granite or painted in graffitti-proof outdoor mural paint and located to achieve maximum public exposure, for instance in the space between PICA and the Alexander Library or the Loftus Street/Graham Farmer freeway intersection.

Artists are invited to submit their entries, however brief, digitally or by post to Behind the 8 Ball, 122 East Parade East Perth WA 6004 / Drawings photos and maquettes are acceptable/artists should also identify their preferred site and provide a photo placement collage for the web show.

As a public service Behind the Eight Ball will prepare a web exhibition of the best eight projects with notes. We will also organise a venue for all entries to displayed. The winner will be presented with a $10 lottery investment. If “its a winner” the money will be used to buy land in Perth and construct the monument in full public view.

One entry has already been received, from Mr David Brown

A life size bronze figure of Mr Howard in his campaign poster pose for 10th Nov 2001. His trousers and underdaks are round his ankles in the pose of mannikin piss. He is standing on rocks covered in seagull shit and pissing vigourously on the heads of a thrashing multicultural stew of water-born refugees, also cast in bronze and semi immersed in the marble fountain bowl.

One drowning man is trying to hold a young girls head above water, behind him is a group in delicate relief including Mr Peter Reith and Mr Kim Beazley smiling and applauding. Plaques around the bowl will carry Mr Howard’s unforgettable recent declarations such as “ I don’t want these kind of people in Australia”.

It goes without saying that this will also be a memorial to the indomitable spirit of the Australian people, who have always rewarded meretricious conduct with complete confidence.

Away with the nauseating ennui of public art

Behind the 8 ball believes that these strange times call for a renewal of critical political art of all kinds. Mr Howard’s recent activities furnish endless opportunities.

Entries should be with us by Christmas eve.

Good luck

Mr 8 Ball