Hilarious HK Subtitles !

Hong Kong Movies are legendary for mind-boggling mangling of the English language. Bad spelling or bad grammar, new or missing words, unintended double meanings and utter nonsense. Even if the film is awful, the subtitles usually entertain.

from Midnight Caller - " You slept with other women, being naked ".

Title of a book featured in Bomb Disposal Squad / Baby Bomb - " How to make a boom ".

from To Live and Die in Tsimshatsui

from Hero Of Tomorrow - "Even though I looked quite good, I can't help you in many thing".

from Profiles Of Pleasure - "Be multiple".

from Police Story 2 "Beat him out of recognizable shape!"

from New Legend of Shaolin "My daughter is so nice, she knows I love eating chicken ass."

from Supercop "Bump him dead."

from Legend of the Liquid Sword

from Kickboxer's Tears "No, it's bad if she's seriously twisted."

from Prison on Fire "Don't tell any that I have high anxiety or I'll beat up up!"

from Operation Condor "Sock him unconscious."

from Brain Theft "A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries."

from Bloody Mary Killer "Same old rules, no eyes, no groin."

from Full Contact

from Eastern Condors

from Holy Weapon "Don't do anything perverted, we are in a hurry."

from Saviour of the Soul "Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected."

from 60 Million Dollar Man "I scare nothing! Even you become napkins!"

from Passionate Killing in the Dream "Catherine is a nasbian!"

from Pom Pom and Hot Hot "I'll fire aimlessly if you don't come out!"

from On the Run "Quiet or I'll blow your throat up!"

from Ultimate Vampire "Suck the coffin mushroom now!"

from Diabolical Erroneous Monk "Fat head! Look at you! You're full of cholesterol."

(Somebody please tell the movies these were in!)

"Bitch, don't step on my intestine." - from Journey to the West: Pandora's Box Part 2

"Don't come back forever" - from Comrades, Almost A Love Story

"$10,000 to anyone who can kiss him" - from First Shot

"They had so many argues" - from Days of Tomorrow

"Don't worried. She's still out of her mind now." - from Beauty's Evil Roses

"I lost another underwear in bathroom" - from Comic Dreams Of '97

"I know you've awared us already" - from Big Score

"It takes turn to tango" - from Once A Thief

"Be careful of your nostral hair" - from Forbidden City Cop

"They were jealousing me" - from Women On The Run

"I please your uterus, you kiss my toes. It's fair" - from Daughter Of Darkness

"Keep cool to avoid enlarge" - from Sex For Sale (1993)

Bastard! An inch longer, an inch stronger - from Fong Sai Yuk

I will give you a good lesson no sooner - from Sex Racecourse

You two must be te steaming dollops he Tree Men that grew after my fertilization - from The Eight Hilarious Gods

It took my seven digestive pills to dissolve your hairy crab - from The Eagle-Shooting Heroes

from Iron Monkey

from Slave Of The Sword

from Bogus Cops


(Actor Simon Yam scolding fellow policewoman)

from Take Me

from 1941 Hong Kong On Fire

from Imp

from Brother Of Darkness

from Hidden Desire

from Horrible High Heels

from 1/3 Lover

from Don't Stop My Crazy Love For You

from Tiger on Beat

from The Big Deal (which sets a new standard in hilarious butchery of English !)

If you know a classic line or two, send it in. Please note that I want quotes from SUBTITLES ONLY, and the name of the film. Also, if possible, who said it.

More silly HK subtitles on DJerome's site and Cissi's

Read fascinating short pieces about the meaning of wu'xia (flying people) or how Japanese names are rendered into Cantonese

If you want to know more about these or any other Hong Kong movies, the definitive site to visit is - HKMDB (HK Movie Database). My reviews appear under "STSH" and can be found by going to hkmdb, clicking on Movie Reviews, then S. There are over 500 reviews, so happy reading.

The book "Sex&Zen : HK cinema" contains a section on the subject of hilarious HK movie subtitles. Stefan Hammond & Mike Wilkins > Titan Books, London UK, 1997 > ISBN 1 85286 775 2

Other Links >

HK movies in South Australia and other links

More HK Movie Quotes

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